Personal Conflict, Astrology and "Stuff."

First consider: You are on an island in the great ocean. You were born there and so were your parents. There are no roads, just paths from one set of huts to another. All day you run along these paths, to and fro, playing with friends. Sometimes you carry wood or water or other items that contribute to daily health and happiness. You are blissful but obviously not informed of the world of television and cars. That world is the occult (beyond the range of ordinary knowledge or experience; mysterious).

This is the state of affairs that most humans find themselves in when they look at an astrological natal chart. "It's Greek to me. I have no idea what that means." is their first reaction.

So here are some words to encourage a little clarity.

Science shows us we are made of the elements found in that periodic chart you saw in your 8th grade science class. (Maybe you didn't see it but it was there). Science has also determined the source of those elements: Exploding stars left great clouds of dust which formed new stars, planets and organic life (that's you BTW).

Yes! Exploded stars are the source of all the atomic parts which comprise the human body. This star-stuff is all there is, materially speaking.

Science has also shown (the U.S Army actually proved this) that you can take a piece of flesh from your body, carry it great distances, lock it and you in separate lead lined rooms.Then they could poke you with a sharp object and the piece of still living flesh will react as if it was still attached to your body.

In other words we are all connected to all that is and no distance or barrier, perceived or otherwise not known, can separate us from the stuff from which we are made, the universe. The very word universe conjures this notion; uni = one, verse= song or utterance.

Now astrology.

We exist in a clock of sorts. Looking from outside the solar system this isn't a difficult image. Little balls of rock and gas, heavy and light relatively, swirling around in the medium of space (space, a misnomer if there ever was one, think "dark matter"), each having it's minute electromagnetic influence on the objects around it.

Actually some influences are not so minute. The earth swells up when the moon passes over head. And it's not such a small swell.

OK... what about you and me? The key is found in the heavenly bodies influence on the ductless glands, e.g. the adrenal glands. Read more about them here.

These glands vary in sensitivity to changes in everything from the physical to the psychic environment. They regulate the other functions of the body and hence impact the mind.

More basic astrology: Natal charts are round, representing the earth at the time you were born, drawn on paper. The left side of the circle shows the Eastern hemisphere, the upper half what was "above the Earth," the right half is Western side and the lower half the "below" the Earth. You, meaning your body-mind, are both the earth and on the Earth.

The moment of your birth becomes an impression that is so powerful it will last till your body dies. (Read more about that first impression here.)

If the planet Mars is in a positions that is called sensitive, like just coming up over the Eastern horizon the moment of your birth (rising, or dawning as it were) your body-mind will register this as a stronger influence than if it were at, let's say, the ten o:clock position. The adrenal glands which have to do with action and are strongly influenced by Mars will be "turned up" a notch. For the duration of your physical life.

The position of a planet in the chart tends to determine it's strength of influence. Hence "sensitive" areas. There have been scientific, statistical studies, see here.

Let's advance out thoughts on this. Keep the picture... Mars is shining on your "cute face" and hopefully mother has you in her arms, cooing and saying "what a beautiful baby." The rest of the planets are out there as well, all giving you a "first impression" of your new body-mind. One of them, Saturn, the planet influencing maturation of body-mind through crystallization (bones come to mind) is over on the Western side of the wheel of life (chart) directly opposite Mars. Adrenaline, from the adrenals ruled by Mars, is fluid metal (notice someone's breath after they've had a fright or got angry or been out playing hard at kick ball and you'll know what I mean by metal). Saturn influences the bones or, as one can easily see when things harden, resistance. So what we have is Mars inspiring action opposed by Saturn resisting, or... conflict.

This is just one perspective on a very complex scene: Mars (rising) in the Twelfth House opposite Saturn (setting) in the Sixth House. There could be a wide variety of potential experiences available; ranging from stifled action resulting in bone-breaking situations as it is projected onto the body, to the ability to act responsibly to mitigate karmic debts, and more. Much More.

Any body opposite any other body in astrology is referred to as opposition. Image it like two pebbles thrown into a pond at the same time, ripples spreading out to meet each other. They will have a tendency to change the surface of the pond in a more pronounced way than they would if dropped separately. If the ripples (vibrational influence) are not in accord by nature, as in the case of Saturn (resistance) and Mars (action), discord and turbulance is the experience. Will has to be constantly applied in some measure to balance the conflicting energies.



If the two bodies were Venus and Neptune you could get a conflict, especially if there are other influences of a less harmonious nature. However, these two planets like each other. Venus is the lower octave of Neptune (just like musical notes, planets vibrate at specific wavelengths). As a result you are more likely to get artistic (Venus) interests that have a spiritual or mystical nature (Neptune) and an "other worldly" quality to the personality.

So what's my point? It's this: If you find you have conflict in your life on a regular basis, whether it's with others, with an idea, or any two or more "things" that exist in either your material or mental universe, you can pretty much bet there are two or more heavenly bodies in opposition in your natal chart.

Learning how to cope requires help. No one comes to self awareness alone. And few study astrology and even fewer of those who study are good at it.

A note of caution: These planetary influences are not an excuse for "fussin and fighten my friend." Even though the influences of the heavens are often quite strong they are never stronger than a will to change. You choose the response, it never chooses you.

If you want to master conflict, I mean if you really want to... check this out. This is real help that puts you in the driver's seat!

"Out of site,
Out of mind,
All I needed was a rhyme for you
c'est la vie"

Greg Lake

Here is a list of the subjects I'll attempt to bring to note over the next few months. I am hesitant to consider an entire year. Best laid plans... and all that jazz.

Sex and commitment.

Some cool stuff about Astrology.

Repeating dreams.

Justification for believing in "past lives."

Stories from the "edge of the cliff I walk."

The three poisons; ignorance, desire and aversion.

The Chicken Or The Egg
or
Your Good Cluck Charm.

Destiny versus Fate.

And hopefully more...

Feel free to suggest a subject or topic and patiently wait for inspiration.

In the meantime should you like to read something written about ten years ago on the subjects of first breath, the birth process and the lies we take from our first moment of ensoulment go here.

The salvia divinorum experiences

This event occurred in the early summer of 2005. The duration from beginning to end took at most twenty minutes. The end may be described as "no evidence beyond my memory of having ingested." A Wikipedia link with more info follows this article.

I've been warned to always have a "sitter" by my side during the salvia experience. Participants have been known to walk away, mindless of environmental obstacles such as traffic, while under its influence. There are three methods of ingestion, smoking, chewing and a tincture. We are choosing to smoke it.

As I take the salvia into my lungs I am instantly in another reality with the only common denominator being I as a point of awareness and my body. Not unlike an extremely vivid lucid dream.

The visual image is of sitting on a simple bench and noticing to my left, further down the bench, another man leaning forward looking directly at me. There are one-maybe two figures between us but I do not see them so much as sense their presence. There is a shadowy quality to the space on the seat to my immediate left. There is a sensation of being alone, or on my own with no close associates in the nearby spaces. The environment was a warm, glowing afternoon about three o'clock somewhere in the Southwest United States, New Mexico maybe. Before me is a green toward yellow grassy area. Over head is a clear blue sky.

I feel in a smaller sense as if I am with a gathering of people, mostly men in a setting with a spiritually oriented purpose not unlike a conference. I know all these men but I cannot name any. It is simply warm familiarity presented as a coloring to the space we are sharing. My impression of myself is that of being older than I am now.

In the same instant I recognize the set and setting there is: A feeling of trying and unable to take a breath as I fall forward; A sense of regret not having said goodbye to my wife Georgiana; Of having, in an attempt to deny this moment of death, made up in the seconds before, an entire lifetime which includes Georgiana. And in that same instant I know I have lived a life completely unrelated in any way to the one I made up, a life with a far greater contribution than I allow myself to believe. The most profound aspect of this moment is I am dead.

As the experience progresses I feel as if a response is expected. I silently form the question “What do you want from me?” The answer comes back as if I'd spoken out loud “We want you to wake up.”

All of the above occurs without the passage of time. As if one could capture in one photograph an entire play.

I recognize there is a “separate reality” to which I am now exposed. I begin to mentally reach for my ordinary reality. My senses tell me it is a cool, dark space in real time in infinite space to my right. I emphatically want to go there, to turn away from the newer reality which is to my left. There is a feeling of desperation. I have an impression I've not used my left-brain hemisphere before now.

I question my ability to distinguish real from imagined. I test myself. Is there a door specifically located in the room where I now remember I should be sitting. Visually the alternate reality still prevails. Is there a person, my "sitter," really with me? I find my voice (swallowing and breathing had been impossible a second before) and I ask out loud “Is there a door over my left shoulder.” The answer “No” resounds. More reasoning: My point of view is from that of actions I would take to reach the door, of having to stand, pivot left walking around behind my chair almost full circle to reach the door which is positioned to my right. Immediately on my right is a table blocking any direct path to the door. I realize my sitter is hearing my question and visualizing me walking into the table. He is protecting me from harm. I ask differently. "Is there a door that I could get up and walk around to?" He responds. “Yes, but I won’t let you.” Now I know I've nearly returned to common reality. I feel the warmth of familiarity and connection. I also feel relief that I might still be able to complete with Georgiana before I pass away from this life. In a moment more I am able to open my eyes and see my friend before me.

I have subsequently realized there was a distinctly pointed message in this experience. Beside the obvious "wake up" was the sense of having allowed my life to languish by the side of the road to complete my purpose for coming to my "common" reality. Part of that purpose is to pass along to others what I have gathered over past lifetimes of seeking spiritual experience. Waking up is a constant. No one is fully awake as long as they are body bound to the material plane. One may be extremely awake to the Truth and live with this Truth as a constant offering. To quote one great sage "GOD is man yet to be fully manifested. Man is GOD yet to be fully realized."



There were three more events after this one over that summer. Over the next few days I expect to post the highlights of those experiences.

A word of caution: Experimenting with your psyche while in a fearful frame of mind should never be done without a loving companion.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Salvia_divinorum

Next event:

The urge to know the full meaning of this experience draws me forward. I feel compelled to explore the separate reality (SR) further.

One week later we make the journey again. I take the salvia smoke into my lungs with hesitation to experience once more my death.

Again in a flash I am confronted by the realistic and wholly undeniable sensation of the instant of my death: There is no turning back, it's finished!

The same environment surrounds me though this time I have an impression of a building in front of me, and the landscape seems cooler. Non-verbal information conveys an affirmation of the previous experience.

There is another difference. As I begin to exit the SR I see there is a field of light out of which I emerge entering the separate reality and then enter as I return to my common reality.

No amount of self assurance quells the feeling of fear of knowing I am dead. That is the crux of the message. I am already dead! I just haven’t accepted it. I'll continue to live in self deception until I end my denial.

Next event:

A month has passed since my last exploration. Because I know now I am unlikely to leave my seat while exploring the SR on this occasion I am alone.

I choose to switch my seating position to that of my sitter/companion to determine if the orientation of my body has an impact. I experienced a directionality to the first two forays into the SR. In the first two events I was seated facing the East. This time I face West. In this event the more brightly lit environment of the SR was from my right rather than my left. I likely had less salvia in the smoking devise because this event is shorter and no images occur other than a brilliant yellow/orange energy field occupying the entire space behind me and to the right. For a moment I decide to extend my awareness into the field. The SR fades before I am able to follow through.

What I have written to this point I wrote as if in real-time. What follows are notes on the subject written over the following few months.

I have explored the psyche through many devises, both deliberately i.e. meditation, psychoactive substances, etc., and spontaneously resulting from painful injuries, near death events or unexpected sensory bombardment. The full immersion in the SR under the influence of the salvia is the first time I had ever lost all contact with my physical senses (the sense of time and space and history of the "Michael" that writes this) without the bliss of full immersion in Love, or cosmic consciousness. It was stark, however bright the light may have been that seemed to come from behind. Along with this is the sense of another consciousness(es) behind me, watching and seemingly benevolent. I have had a sense of being watched from over my shoulder before on several occasions in life. Often while alone in the wilderness or on the road hitchhiking. This time I wanted to join it, or them, after my panic subsided some. I want to believe it would welcome me if I were to go as far with the salvia as I could. However, at this point my fear is an obstacle. I really want to get past the fear.

Today and last night I've experienced deeper than usual sadness about unfulfilled potential. Passing before I achieve the destiny I know is there is quite disturbing.

Regarding the fear I had passed away suddenly without saying goodbye: All of my life I’ve been clearing my slate so I may start the next life unburdened to the greatest possible degree. I remember choosing this before incarnating this body. I have unrealized desires and fears I have yet to confront. Not for lack of consideration. More likely because of fear I'll lose control of those elements of my life to which I have become attached. Early in life there was very little attachment to people or things.

I must move forward in spite of the fear. I am afraid also that I won’t. Maybe there is just fear and it isn’t really about or of anything.

Today I asked the higher self what I should do. The answer: “Make a joke.”

I translated this into “use the qualities and nuances of the illusion to play out the role of a priest as I know it to be. Be the sinful saint and be it well with the time I have left.

My wonderful, good and beautiful friend Robert wants me to be the lead the SKIgroup which is small and intimate… I would love that. It would fulfill a dream I’ve had in mind since 1973.

You Did What?!

Let us assume for a moment that GOD is actually all It has claimed Itself to be. (I use It instead of Him or Her because in my personal experience GOD has never come across to me as having a gender.) Since there are references to many characteristics I’ll be more specific. Let’s focus on references to GOD being omnipotent, omniscient and omnipresent. You can find these in the following scriptures: "For nothing is impossible with God" (Luke 1:37), "Where can I go from Your Spirit? Where can I flee from Your presence? If I go up to the heavens, You are there; if I make my bed in the depths, You are there" (Psalm 139:7-8), "Nothing in all creation is hidden from God's sight. Everything is uncovered and laid bare before the eyes of Him to whom we must give account" (Hebrews 4:13).

These qualities are attributed to GOD on several occasions throughout the Old and New Testaments. One will find every major religion refers to the Supreme Being in similar tones. GOD is everywhere, all seeing and all powerful.

Another element in our quasi-academic examination is the obvious shortcomings of translating a language such as Hebrew or Greek into English. These languages are so rich in meaning that the very letters convey deep metaphysical principals. English is linear and superficial when compared with multilayered languages thousands of years old. However, since we have already assumed GOD is omnipresent then it follows there is GOD’s Truth in all things (GOD wouldn’t lie to us right?), regardless of language.

Now, let’s take a particular set of circumstances mention in the Old Testament. I’ll paraphrase: GOD calls Moses up the mountain (after scaring the hell out of everyone) and tells him there are twelve “commandments” he wants us all to “keep.” You’ll find it in Exodus 20.1-17. You’ve heard at least one or two I’m certain: Thou shalt put no other God before me. Thou shalt not steal… commit adultery, bear false witness, etc.

Here is where we begin our assembly of “points of view.”

First we have a GOD that is everywhere, seeing everything and can do (or not do) what It wants no matter what anybody else may have to say about it.

Illustration:
I have to tell you the story of the GURU who told the disciple to “Take this chicken where nobody sees and kill it.” After three days the disciple returns with the chicken clucking cheerfully and says “Master, everywhere I go the chicken sees.”

Next we have twelve commandments, which I am going to refer to as Cosmic Law, because I believe that’s what they are.

Then, practically in the same breath (GOD likely takes really deep breaths which may be why we don’t hear much for long periods of time), GOD tells Moses to tell Joshua (probably a sergeant) to get a bunch of guys together and go murder everyone they find in the valley. Everything wasted, including the animals and plants. Bring nothing home! Look in Exodus 34.11-17 if you’re interested in the story.


So here’s my take on it (aside from the fact GOD’s idea of killing and our world cultural view of killing is radically different). We don’t really have a choice regarding these Cosmic Laws. They are Divine and are transcended only by the Divine.

GOD wasn’t saying attempting to disobey these rules necessarily means you're bad. Guilty? I suppose it depends on one’s agenda. It does point out one's ignorance however. GOD was saying it is impossible to exist outside of these laws. You cannot kill! Only GOD gives or takes life, which by the way isn’t a purely physical phenomena. The physical is animated. Life is the essence of being and as such permeates even non-animated matter. It cannot be killed. The entire universe is alive!

Stealing somebody’s stuff. Ha! It isn’t somebody’s stuff. It’s GOD’s stuff. GOD puts it here and GOD takes it away. Where could you take it that GOD wouldn’t have it anyway?

Adultery is an interesting concept. We have a lot of fun trying to outwit GOD on this one. Alas! It isn’t to be. In the first place I suspect we really don’t have a clue as to the real meaning of adultery, yet. Putting something into something else to make each an impure version of the other.

Dictionary: adulterate, verb [ trans. ] render (something) poorer in quality by adding another substance, typically an inferior one…

Now that’s a joke. Make GOD, which is everywhere, impure?

One more… and you can go through the rest on your own.

Honor thy mother and father. Could I have chosen differently after I discovered who they were? No! I look at myself and I see them in me. I hold my parents, GOD the Father, GOD the Mother and Kenneth Stone and Iola Hodges up for everyone to see twenty four seven.

So in the end what matters? If we can’t break the laws why did GOD point them out? I feel certain that suffering (to put it mildly) is a key element to the answer.

It seems our effort to get around what we think of as simply directives turn out to be our faulty perception of a Master Plan. These laws are really like corrals one sees around cow pastures. The herd is forced into a little area in the pasture so each creature can be handled one on one. The laws leave us no option to avoid becoming conscious of our GOD nature. These laws will humble and eventually open your eye to the grace of a truly merciful creator. Especially if you struggle with guilt.

One More: Put no other GOD before me. Yea! Try it and see how fast the little preferred God goes from interest to passion to habit to addiction to allergy to a very sour, unpalatable taste in one’s mouth.

Here’s an interesting book: SERMON ON THE MOUNT ACCORDING TO THE VEDANTA Swami Prabhavananda isbn-10: 0874810507, isbn-13: 9780874810509
Find it here for two dollars used. It’s worth a lot more. http://www.fetchbook.info/compare.do?search=9780874810509

Three Days Out

I’d been on the road three days, thumbing my way from Eugene, Oregon. My ride, a couple in an RV camper bus let me out as they turned off the Interstate, heading North on US 191 in Arizona. It wasn't the end of the earth but you could see it from there.

I hadn't eaten since I came across wild blackberries next to a cool creek running near the highway somewhere in Northern California. I'd stuffed myself but that was two days past. I was as hungry as ever, standing there in the Arizona desert.

There wasn't a building in sight and traffic lent new meaning to the word minimal. So, as was my habit and desire, I walked.

In the years between 1971 and 1976 I put more than fifty thousand miles on my thumb and the day of the week was far from my mind. That said… it felt like Sunday afternoon.

My destination was Melbourne, Florida, more than two thousand miles and at least three more days even if I flew like the wind. And honestly, I really couldn't have cared less about that either.

Seriously humid Melbourne, with its "fishing village" ambience, was home base, more or less. It had been my starting point and I had turned around at Eugene.

The desert Southwest is a strange place with even stranger weather. On visits to the high mountain deserts in Colorado I've seen rain appearing to fall up, likely due to wind, unfelt from my vantage point. This day in Arizona was no less strange. As I walked along this lonely stretch of asphalt I mused under a cloudless azure sky. The sun was burning at my back, bringing drops of sweat to the skin. On the shaded side, cold constantly pressed me. It was winter in America but at the edge of nowhere it was all seasons at once. To add mystery, rain fell in large drops widely spaced; hitting like pebbles against my face. But truth be told, I was happy and felt the freedom of no hurry, no worry, no tightness in my gut from unfulfilled obligations. Like the Roger Miller song "King of the Road."

I was hungry though.

I walked about 5 miles, a few cars whizzed by on their way to a future ahead of mine. Then, without thinking, I stopped to feel the distance I could only guess at looking across the desert at the mountains toward the North. As I stood in
contemplation of the moment my attention was slowly drawn down to a shiny black object, incongruous in the red dirt and scrabble. Analytical thought snapped my focus to a sharpened point. Incredible! I was looking at an a-frame styled lady's black patent leather handbag, about the size of a large lunch box. It sported a short strap. I walked the five steps to it, lifted and opened it as I realized it carried no dust on its sides. There was no sign of wear or damage and I thought, "It's brand new and probably empty." That thought was followed with the view of a bag full of lady's personal items and accouterment.

I rifled it and discovered what I sought most: Chewing gum, a large package with nearly ten sticks of Wrigley’s spearmint. Yea! Food!

There was a wallet with eleven dollars and some silver and identification. The cards and notes indicated the bag's owner to be an artist in good standing with art guilds and women's social clubs.

I was glad for the gum but I felt her loss as if it was my own. I had no idea how I would return it to her. I've lost wallets. It was always traumatic but even after long waits I've retrieved them, often through the kindness of others.

I walked a bit further and soon had a ride with an old man in a pickup truck. He said he'd drop me at a truck stop where he was to turn off into the desert to his home.

At the truck stop I gobbled up eleven dollars worth of Mexican style food (umm good) and handed the bag to the cashier. She said she would pass it to the sheriff and he would see she got it back. I walked out the door, stuck my thumb out and my next ride took me all the way to Melbourne. That part of the journey is a stranger story still.

Post Script

What might you take from this as valuable to yourself? I suggest considering that faith in the belief that you are cared for and watched over by what you consider a Higher Power will put you in the right place at the right time. Every moment of every day of your life choices are made. Choices made in alignment with the greatest good for all that is will ultimate lead to your satisfaction.